Kaldor’s Morality

A blog about my morals … sad to say I have very few. I usually do what is expedient, gives me pleasure, money or some kind of stability in an unstable world.

As you may know, I’ve known some success. I’ve been a writer and producer on TV, but I’ve also been a serial sexual nut, an adulterer, an orgiastic, and a dope dealer.

After escaping death twice, I swore I’d change my ways, but not because of fear of God, but because I wanted to do right for mankind. I’m an atheist.

Going straight, I continued to write and became somewhat of an actor … and that’s where my morals took another severe plunge. My greatest success as an actor was and still is in commercials. And being that this is the United States of America where everything is for sale, I have appeared in commercials which are downright immoral. A lot of them will actually cause early death.

  • McDonalds – an abomination which inflicts irreparable damage to nature and your body.
  • Burger King – Ditto.
  • Ford Trucks – Fouls the atmosphere.
  • Tylenol – 12 tablets at one time will kill you.
  • Starbucks – will make you nervous and I don’t believe a thing of what they say about being ecologically responsible.
  • MasterCard – Do I really have to go there and explain that 19% interest on your debt is immoral?

And tomorrow I’m doing a Hyundai commercial … more pollution on an already staggering earth.

Of course, I hope I get it. That’s how immoral I am. Besides, I like people saying they saw me on TV. As if that really means anything. And then there’s the money—although I don’t need it—it’s still good.

In closing, I think of a friend of mine, Ralph James, who was a voiceover artist. He was a good one, but was always broke because of his plethora of ex-wives that were garnisheeing his salary. He still wouldn’t do vo’s for commercials for banks, savings and loans, credit card companies, or other scams. He was a Mexican that grew up poor, and those institutions kept his family in debt and poverty.

I salute his bravery. Ralphie rest in peace … And now on to The Hyundai commercial.

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